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Practical Intuition with Kay

Supporting the inner lives of us grown-ups… I help people "knock the bricks off their wings and truly fly," as one client beautifully put it... I'm Kay, an artist, author, and coach. I live in Massachusetts, USA, with my husband, sons, and our 12-1/2-year-old pet chicken. Connect with me at kaylockkolp.com. PS This show used to be called We Turned Out Okay… You're in the right place! The first 375-ish episodes were created with that name. Much has changed around here, but much has stayed the same. I'm glad you are here!
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Now displaying: February, 2020
Feb 27, 2020

What do you do when:
– Your six-year-old witnessed a traumatic event, and is so traumatized that he feels he can never be away from your side
– Your four-year-old "really misses mommy and daddy" and cannot enjoy his enrichment class
– You fear your three-year-old's "declining independence," because she increasingly needs you by her side as she is going potty, getting dressed, and going to sleep at night
– Your seven-year-old is afraid to be alone in the upstairs of your house, while you are downstairs
– Your 11-year-old is feeling anxious about getting separated while skiing

Each of these situations come up in today's Live Case Study…
Join us and find out how to handle each!

PS - 50% off the annual Ninja Parenting Community rate

NPC member BabyBrain worried about her daughter's fear of being alone in any room in their new house – so, she asked for help.
And I created an entire course on handling your child's clingy behavior.
This course is a drop in the bucket of all the resources available for you there, to help you enjoy family time more.

This Leap Year, take the leap – 50% off Annual NPC membership!

Jump into the Ninja Parenting Community and start enjoying family life for real!
Click here for details, and to join at this amazing rate!

The following links come up in today's Case Study:

My conversation with Dr. Laura Markham in episode 255 of the We Turned Out Okay podcast, https://weturnedoutokay.com/255

Some fantastic downloads by Dr. Deborah MacNamara, including one about "what kids worry about at different ages" http://macnamara.ca/downloads/

The link where you can learn more about how to work closely with me, solving your biggest parenting challenges to get you feeling happy inside yourself and also enjoying family time: https://weturnedoutokay.com/joinnpc

Cheers! And thanks for watching/listening!
Karen
Karen Lock Kolp, M.Ed.

Website: https://weturnedoutokay.com
Facebook: http://facebook.com/weturnedoutokay

Helping parents change kids' behavior from bad to good, feel happy inside, and TRULY enjoy family time : )

Feb 25, 2020

So, there's a tiny swear, the word bada**, in the break of today's episode… while I'm sharing about last week's hospitalization of one of my sons.

(There is also an invitation to you, to join the Ninja Parenting Community at 50% off the standard annual rate! Click here for details : )

– A parenting book about showing up
– A new action-adventure podcast for kids ages 8 to 12
– An awesome ninja tactic for handling your child backtalk and disrespect
– A manifesto for parents by a beloved author
What do these all have in common?
They dive into the positive and important beliefs their creators have about raising kids – and being parents – in today's busy and frazzled world.
Listen in to this week's episode for lots of parenting news that will help you formulate and live your beliefs!
(Here is the link to this episode)

Sign up for my Weekly Parenting Newsletter

Each Wednesday I send out a Parenting Newsletter, to help you stay sane while raising your kiddos.
Past editions have included how to make it so your child wins the parent lottery (even if you did not), and helping when your child is frightened.
Useful stuff.
Click weturnedoutokay.com/weekly so it zooms right into your inbox each week!

Feb 18, 2020

Welcome! To listen to today's episode, scroll down to the very bottom of this post and hit the triangular "play" button. Enjoy the show!
Recently an NPC member brought up a hugely important issue, and it sparked a whole line of thinking for me that led us to this video!

Here's the issue: "It would be interesting to hear some data/facts on how harmful NOT disciplining your kids can be. So many times we focus on the negative effects of discipline – spanking, timeouts, etc., but what's easy to forget is just how dangerous it is to take a backseat parenting your children."

So let's have a parenting-style smackdown:
Which is worse, Passive or Dictatorial Parenting?

The winner is… Both!
The worst parts of passive parenting – the lack of boundaries and having any expectations about our children's behavior – and the worst parts of authoritarian (which here I'm calling dictatorial or autocratic) – exerting control, simply for control's sake – both amount to a kind of neglect.

  • The passive parenting amounts to neglect because it is terrifying for children to not have any boundaries or expectations for good behavior.
  • The authoritarian parenting amounts to neglect because in this style, no thought is given to the child's experience, thinking, or ability to reason.

What should we do instead?
We should try to hit the middle of the spectrum. Somewhere between the extremes of Passive, and Authoritarian, lies Authoritative, also called Wise. It's the kind of parenting that will help you raise healthy and happy kids.
"The children of psychologically Wise parents," Angela Duckworth writes in Grit: The Power of Passion and Perseverance, fare better than children raised in any other kind of household."

We dive into all that today!
I hope it helps you garner the courage to make any necessary changes in your parenting style.

Links and notes at: weturnedoutokay.com/318
Special thank you to the ninja parent who asked this question. I hope this helps <3

Sign up for my Weekly Parenting Newsletter

Each week I send out a couple parenting newsletters, to help you stay sane while raising your kiddos.
I just wrapped up a series on "Kids gone sideways," all about what to do when with meltdowns, disrespect, and potty training challenges…
Useful stuff!
Click weturnedoutokay.com/weekly so it zooms right into your inbox each week!

Today's episode is sponsored by the amazing Janine Halloran, expert in teaching kids coping skills, who has created some great resources to help your child handle it when the going gets tough!
Listen to today's show to find out how to get 15% off your order, and then
Click copingskillsforkids.com/okay to check out Janine's Coping Skills for Kids Cue Card Decks.

Feb 11, 2020

Will you be my Valentine? I have a special gift exclusively for newsletter subscribers… Click here to read my most recent newsletter (all about Valentine's Day) and to subscribe!

"Schools are way, way behind the times when it comes to what kids need today," one of today's guests, educational psychologist Dr. Rob Reiher, shares during our conversation.
Rob and his podcast cohost, Wayne Yercha, teamed up because they saw a disparity not just in schools, but in children's entertainment.

So they created two shows! Live Above the Noise is the "for parents" show about helping kids find, and listen to, their inner voice – and speaking personally, it's a show that survived my 2019 digital reset because they give real insight into how we can best raise our little kids.

Their other show, Shieldstar Knights, debuts this week! It's an action-adventure show for kids ages 8 to 12, and differs from most other kids' entertainment by solving problems in other ways besides violence. (It's definitely geared towards kids between eight and 12, it would be pretty scary for younger children! Maybe listen, before you introduce it to your kids, just to be sure : )
We dig into both, and lots more, in this episode of We Turned Out Okay.

Join us!

Click weturnedoutokay.com/317 for everything we talk about in today's episode : )

Sign up for my Weekly Parenting Newsletter

Each week I send out a couple parenting newsletters, to help you stay sane while raising your kiddos. (This one is about enjoying Valentine's Day when you've got littles running around and includes the link to become a subscriber yourself.)
I just wrapped up a series on "Kids gone sideways," so you can learn what to do when even the basics are a challenge!
Useful stuff.
Click weturnedoutokay.com/weekly so it zooms right into your inbox each week!

Click here for the We Turned Out Okay Facebook group.

And if you need some extra support for the tough parts of your parenting journey, join the private coaching community that I run! Click here to find out more, and to join.

Feb 4, 2020

What we believe influences everything: our thoughts, our interactions, our relationships, and in the end our reality.
But it can be really hard to nail down what we actually believe.
In today's episode I take you into my beliefs, show you how I figured out what they are, and most importantly help you clarify your own.
It's a master class in getting the reality that you want most – both as a parent and as a person. I hope you find this episode helpful!

Click weturnedoutokay.com/316 for a cheat sheet on how to define your beliefs, and on the links that come up in today's episode.

Also – Throughout February, in Instagram, I am posting my beliefs!
Click Instagram.com/weturnedoutokay (or find @weturnedoutokay in the app) to see them!
Thanks for listening!

Sign up for my Weekly Parenting Newsletter

Each week I send out a couple parenting newsletters, to help you stay sane while raising your kiddos. (In today's episode I talk about the most recent newsletter, on the role kindness plays in improving my health, as I have lived with a tendon disorder for eight and half years.)
We're doing a series right now on "Kids gone sideways," so you can learn what to do when even the basics are a challenge!
Useful stuff.
Click weturnedoutokay.com/weekly so it zooms right into your inbox each week!

Today's episode is sponsored by the amazing Janine Halloran, expert in teaching kids coping skills, who has created some great resources to help your child handle it when the going gets tough!
Listen to today's show to find out how to get 15% off your order, and then
Click copingskillsforkids.com/okay to check out Janine's Coping Skills for Kids Cue Card Decks.

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