Info

The We Turned Out Okay Podcast

What kind of hijinks did you get up to as a kid? Did you climb trees? Did you run around outside barefoot? Did you eat raw cookie dough? Maybe you wanted to do these and other crazy things, but you weren't allowed… Let me ask you this: what if your children wanted to? Would you let them? If you hesitate there, well, you're in the right place. The We Turned Out Okay podcast is where we learn the hows and whys of hovering less and enjoying our young children more. You get to learn from host Karen Lock Kolp's mistakes, but especially from the successes of her guests. Each helpful, lively conversation illustrates why this show really is "The Modern Guide to Old-School Parenting."
RSS Feed Subscribe in Apple Podcasts
The We Turned Out Okay Podcast
2017
December
November
October
September
August
July
June
May
April
March
February
January


2016
December
November
October
September
August
July
June
May
April
March
February
January


2015
December
November
October
September
August
July
June
May
April


All Episodes
Archives
Now displaying: 2017
Dec 17, 2017

Are you, like lots of your fellow listeners, noticing a certain unhappiness creeping in to your daily life? A sense of insanity that you cannot escape from? Overwhelm at all the stuff you've got to do in pretty short amount of time, and getting shorter every day?

Then you should join the free 5-Day Handle the Holidays Challenge.

It starts tomorrow if you're listening in real time – Monday, December 18 – and in today's quickie bonus episode I share some reasons why listeners are joining…

I also share a little story about burnout, right here in my own life.

Thanks for listening!

Sign-ups for the Handle the Holidays challenge end TONIGHT. Don't miss out!
Click the link below to join
weturnedoutokay.com/funDecember

Dec 12, 2017
In today's episode I tell a story about a woman who once sat at a table full of loved ones, watched some of these loved ones manipulate her child, and feel completely powerless to help.
 
Maybe you've found yourself in a similar situation:
 – You understand that holiday gatherings include some degree of etiquette and civil niceties

 – But sometimes these people – these dear relatives, friends, loved ones – can push our buttons and set off our children.They can really wake the Mama/Papa Bear in each of us.

Sometimes we can feel truly helpless in handling complex social situations, and this time of year, we see A LOT of loved ones, magnifying the problem.

 
Today's episode is all about how to handle that type of situation!
 
Listen to learn the ninja tactic of getting control of a situation, especially involving your child, and especially in the public setting of a family/friend gathering, where everything can feel so contentious.
 
It's the first in this year's Holiday Parenting Survival Guide...
Key links at weturnedoutokay.com/202. Happy listening!
Dec 7, 2017

In today's episode with 3-time returning champion Janine Halloran, the conversation goes in all kinds of useful directions, many of which I did not see coming!

Listen to learn more about:
– Big Feelings, the ones Janine says "feel like you can't contain them in your body"
– How to stop engaging in the all-too-common and dangerous parenting ploy, "positively invalidating" our kids' feelings
– Whether your young child is lucky, or unlucky, in the expression of feelings (and the HUGE difference this can make in a child's life)

The Handle the Holidays FREE 5-Day Challenge, designed to help you cut through the BS and really enjoy this time of year, starts in just over a week!
With daily emails that will give you a series of quick wins beamed into your inbox each day of the challenge, and a Facebook live in our private We Turned Out Okay Facebook group on the last day (Friday, December 22, 2017), you'll have a whole new outlook on how to really enjoy these last days of 2017!
Click here to participate in one of WTOO's favorite listener rituals – the challenge – and feel better about the holidays at the same time!

Key links at weturnedoutokay.com/201 – happy listening!

Dec 5, 2017

Ermagerrrd, Episode 200!!

It is fitting that this particular episode is with a guest who specializes in helping families tell stories – really, in helping people preserve their family legacies.

Nicola Davison, mom

, biographer, and journalist, has hit upon an idea that really resonated with me, so I know it will resonate with you: engaging our parents and grandparents to tell their stories, and to get your kids involved for a multigenerational understanding of where we come from, and how we got here.

Speaking of "how we got here," I couldn't let episode 200 go by without talking about how WE got HERE.

And in talking about THAT, we can't help but discuss how to get where we want to go, and how to help our kids do the same.

Thank you for sticking with me for 200 episodes! It's an honor to be in your ears, and even more so when you tell a friend about the show, or go to my contact page to share a story or question.

Go to weturnedoutokay.com/200 to sign up for the upcoming FREE 5-Day Handle the Holidays Challenge and for the key links Nicola and I talk about this episode. Happy listening!

Nov 28, 2017

I'm kicking off the holiday season insanity with an episode that is counter-intuitively meta-level… And I promise, there will be time for more practical ideas before the end of the year.

But this one is special, something I've wanted to talk about on the show for a while now, regarding how easy it is for us to step all over our children's dreams, both their short-term, heart's-desire hopes, and the long-term big, passionate ideas.

Recently I read something that helped me realize: there are three really good reasons to support our kids in their dreams.

One of these reasons is for their own safety.

Go to weturnedoutokay.com/199 for key links, and happy listening!

Last Day to Join the Streamline Your Whole Life 21-Day Challenge!

If you want to:
– Handle afterschool activities, bedtime routines, and homework like a ninja parent
– Work better with everyone who looks after your child
– Deal with the time crunches and scheduling issues that come with the parenting job
– Feel better within yourself

This challenge will help you SO much.

Streamline your whole life during these 21 days (which begin as soon as you join, no need to wait at all), work closely with me on your toughest parenting conundrums, and feel like a new person at the end!

I'm running a holiday season special, so you get the benefit of the challenge at half off the normal cost… But the special ends TODAY Tuesday, November 28.

Click here for details and to sign up for the Streamline Your Whole Life 21-Day Challenge!

Questions? Get answers on my contact page : )

Nov 26, 2017

If you want to:
– Handle afterschool activities, bedtime routines, and homework like a ninja parent
– Work better with everyone who looks after your child
– Deal with the time crunches and scheduling issues that come with the parenting job
– Feel better within yourself

I've got a 21-day challenge to help you!

Streamline your whole life during these 21 days (which begin as soon as you join, no need to wait at all), work closely with me on your toughest parenting conundrums, and feel like a new person at the end!

I'm running a holiday season special, so you get the benefit of the challenge at half off the normal cost… But only for a few more days, the special ends Tuesday, November 28.

Click here for details and to sign up for the Streamline Your Whole Life 21-Day Challenge!

Questions? Get answers on my contact page : )

Nov 23, 2017

Happy Thanksgiving!

At first glance this may seem a peculiar episode for Thanksgiving Day… parenting through tough times? While for many people holidays are a wonderful time, for some they're difficult.

Dealing with family members who disagree with your politics; protecting your kids from cheek-pinching, insult-comic-style aged relatives; feeling like you have to justify your life choices – these and more can make it pretty tough.

Today's parent ninja tactics are going to be awesome for your Thanksgiving table if any of the above is coming into play for you… But they're even better, even more important to keep in mind, if you are going through some kind of a crisis.

Like a friend of mine, who is going through a tough time – and who asked me to do an episode on how best to handle parenting through crisis.

So whether you are dealing with something momentous in your life, or you are just concerned about how to make it through the day without smacking somebody, this one is for you!

Need more help than I can offer with the podcast?
I'm opening up the Streamline Your Whole Life 21-Day Challenge, which gives you a quick win every day for three whole weeks!

Make your evenings less chaotic, build better relationships with your child's caregivers, and feel happier within yourself – and work closely with me for a whole month – when you join.
Click here for details and to sign up for the Streamline Your Whole Life 21-Day Challenge!

Key links at weturnedoutokay.com/198. Happy listening!

Nov 21, 2017

This is one conversation I have been SUPER excited to bring you for a really long time!

During my talk with Ignore It! author Dr. Catherine Pearlman, a.k.a. The Family Coach, she answers listener questions, talks about what works to stop bullying, and most importantly comes up with tons of ways that you can curb your child's bad behavior and REALLY enjoy life with your kids to the fullest.

Key links at weturnedoutokay.com/197 – happy listening!

Nov 14, 2017

A podcast listener wrote to me recently with a a really good and important question:

"We see all kinds of ways for girls to deal with being assaulted, how to prevent it, how to heal, support groups and the like… How do we teach boys to keep their hands to themselves or what not to say?" She's got a two-year-old boy and she does not want him to grow up into harasser or an abuser.

I based this episode on the awesome and wonderful responses I got when I asked this listener's question on my Facebook page.

In today's episode identify 4 key steps we as parents need to take in order to raise children who both do not grow up to be harassers or abusers, and who successfully resist being harassed or abused.

Go to weturnedoutokay.com/196 to see these steps written down, and for key links!

Nov 9, 2017

Today is one of my very favorite kinds of shows, a Parent-Coaching Call with an NPC member!

– – A HUGE tree fell in our yard during a buck wild nor'easter last week, and we lost power for days! (Click here to check out the video I made of the tree!) All back now and everything is okay… But I had to delay the start of our epic "How to Help Your Child Navigate the Choppy Social Waters of Life Without Getting Pulled Under Yourself or Losing Your Mind" mastercourse.
The first live module now goes up on Tuesday, November 14, giving you until Monday, November 13 to enroll!
If you can't make it to the modules live, you'll always be able to catch them in our password-protected online classroom - plus ask questions over the whole 6 weeks of the mastercourse in our private Survive the Social Stuff Facebook group, exclusively for those enrolled in the course.…
To learn more and sign up go to weturnedoutokay.com/socialstuff! – –

In each parent-coaching call, NPC members disclose their struggles and I put my years of experience with young children and degrees in early childhood education and human development/family relations to work, figuring out exactly what steps will help most (and fastest).
It's an exclusive benefit for members of my private coaching community, and the great thing is that even if you're not a member, you get answers to mind-bending parenting conundrums as well!

Here are the issues that Jen is seeing with her 5-and 3-year-old daughters:
1) What to do about endless whining, when all the tools in the toolbox have been tried – redirection is not working, making no sound like yes is not working, and her head is about ready to explode?

2) What to do when the girls take one or two bites out of an apple and then want to throw the rest of the apple away, or similar food conundrums, usually having to do with snacks, especially those that "don't portion out well"

If either of these seems familiar, you are going to LOVE this episode.

NPC members: view the expanded notes and action steps – and read about how Jen did with these issues – by clicking here (just remember you must be logged in to view).
Not a member of the Ninja Parenting Community? Click here.

Go to weturnedoutokay.com/195 key links : )

Nov 7, 2017

– – A HUGE tree fell in our yard during a buck wild nor'easter last week, and we lost power for days! (Click here to check out the video I made of the tree!) All back now and everything is okay… But I had to delay the start of our epic "How to Help Your Child Navigate the Choppy Social Waters of Life Without Getting Pulled Under Yourself or Losing Your Mind" mastercourse.
The first live module now goes up on Tuesday, November 14, giving you until Monday, November 13 to enroll!
If you can't make it to the modules live, you'll always be able to catch them in our password-protected online classroom - plus ask questions over the whole 6 weeks of the mastercourse in our private Survive the Social Stuff Facebook group, exclusively for those enrolled in the course.…
To learn more and sign up go to weturnedoutokay.com/socialstuff! – –

Today's conversation is one of those awesome ones that went in a completely different direction than I had thought it would.
I knew we were going to talk about racism, and parenting, and how New York Times best-selling author Joshilyn Jackson teaches creative writing to prisoners – but when, early on in our conversation, Joshilyn shared "I didn't have any empathy until I became a mom," my heart just stopped.

How could that possibly be, I wondered?

And so we raced off into a discussion that will help you understand empathy as a crucial parenting skill, perhaps the most important ninja tactic of all.

You are going to LOVE it.

Go to weturnedoutokay.com/194 for key links : )

Nov 2, 2017

It's agonizing to watch your child go through the social stuff of life.

You know what I'm talking about:
When you spend your days stopping angry sibling fights, as if you were a boxing referee.
When one of them gets made fun of at school – or worse, bullied.
When they get broken up with by a friend.
When they have a crush on a fellow eight-year-old and say to you "who could love a face like this?"

If your heart breaks or you feel shellshocked when something like this happens, you are not alone.

I'm offering a new approach that gives you the power to support your child, set aside your inner demons, and be happier in your parenting.
It's a new 6-week mastercourse, and it changes everything:

How to Help Your Child Navigate the Choppy Social Waters of Life Without Losing Your Mind or Getting Pulled Under Yourself
Click the course title or go to weturnedoutokay.com/socialstuff to learn more…

Space is Limited!! Sign up now to save your spot – LOTS of listeners struggle with the social stuff and spots will go fast!

The course starts this coming Tuesday, November 7…
And you can go to the course's secret Facebook group immediately upon registering and paying!

You'll learn:
– How to help your child navigate the social landscape
– Strategies for helping your child stand up to a bully, deal with sibling rivalry, and gain social confidence and competence
– Why your agony and heartbreak over your child's struggles may be hurting him or her socially
– How to feel better within yourself while helping your child feel better

Come get started on this new approach right away –
Sign up now!

Oct 31, 2017

Today, I answer a listener question about how to buckle in a squirming child who doesn't want to be in a car seat. And then I tackle something that makes us all squirm…

The unhappy social stuff in our kids' lives.

You know what I'm talking about:
When you spend your days stopping angry sibling fights, as if you were a boxing referee.
When one of them gets made fun of at school – or worse, bullied.
When they get broken up with by a friend.
When they have a crush on a fellow eight-year-old and say to you "who could love a face like this?"

If your heart breaks – or you feel shellshocked – when something like this happens, you are not alone.

You need to learn about the new approach that gives you the power to support your child, set aside your inner demons, and be happier in your parenting.
This new 6-week mastercourse changes everything:

How to Help Your Child Navigate the Choppy Social Waters of Life Without Losing Your Mind or Getting Pulled Under Yourself
Click the course title or go to weturnedoutokay.com/socialstuff to learn more…

Space is Limited!! Sign up now to save your spot – LOTS of listeners struggle with the social stuff and spots will go fast!

The course starts this coming Tuesday, November 7…
And you can go to the course's secret Facebook group immediately upon registering and paying!

Come get started on this new approach right away –
Sign up now!

Find out how to handle squirmy social stuff in today's episode and go to weturnedoutokay.com/193 for key links.

Oct 26, 2017

Listen to today's episode for a quick and easy way to cut down on your child's bad behavior : )

– – – New Course Offering: It's agonizing to watch your child go through the social stuff of life; getting called a mean name or crybaby; getting "broken up with" by a friend, encountering sibling strife. It upsets us parents because 1) our heart breaks for our beautiful child, and 2) we don't know what to do to help..
I'm offering something new and different that will create a new opportunity for you:
The Surviving the Social Stuff course. It's tailored to participants' needs, so whatever social stuff is going on in your child's life – THAT'S what you'll learn how to handle.
It's super helpful as we get into the high-emotion holidays, with weekly class meetings starting Tuesday, November 7 and running right through into January.
Space is limited!!
So, if you're struggling with anything social in your child's life, Click Here to sign up..
Then you'll be feeling less alone and learning new ways to Survive the Social Stuff! – – –

For key links, go to weturnedoutokay.com/192!

Oct 24, 2017

Each fall as the nights get longer and Halloween gets close, spooky feelings crop up. They can be fun, but for kids these feelings also be downright frightening.

Today I'm excited to bring you my conversation with my youngest, Jason, who remembers well the feeling of being afraid of the dark and shares really great advice for helping your kids cope with their fears.

We talk about all kinds of Halloweeny stuff, and also:
– Einstein's view of the world
– Why validating a kid's fears is the gateway to helping them feel less afraid
– Jay's all-important question:
"How does pretending an avocado is alive show a mastery of empathy?"

… Just to give you an idea of the kind of conversations we have around here : )

Key links, including the one about Surviving the Social Stuff, the course that will help you feel less alone AND help your child navigate scary social waters, at weturnedoutokay.com/191!

Oct 21, 2017

Sexually abused at age 7, I consider myself not a victim, but a survivor.
In today's bonus episode, brought on by the #MeToo movement, I share the most important tool in my healing – and the conviction that, if you or a loved one has been sexually abused or harassed, there is help and hope for a good life (even a great one).

Click here for key links, and please consider sharing this episode if you feel like it will help somebody in your life feel better. Thanks, and thanks for listening!

Oct 17, 2017

Given their small stature and relative powerlessness, the idea of something as powerFUL as a gun captivates young children. But in the violent world we live in, their fascination can seem to us morbid and frightening…
All the more so in the wake of mass shootings like the one just a few weeks ago in Las Vegas.
Today's show gives you concrete ideas about how to raise a nonviolent child in our violent world, and how to feel better if you, like me, share your home with a pint-sized gun enthusiast.

Key links at weturnedoutokay.com/190;
Click here to get concrete help for the huge and important questions in your parenting, by checking out the Ninja Parenting Community!

Oct 12, 2017

In which a coaching client of mine shows me that something I'd always thought to be truly impossible is, in fact, possible.
It brings up the question "what happens to our children when we believe something is impossible?" Alternatively, what happens to them when we believe that something is possible?

Key links at weturnedoutokay.com/189;
Click here to learn more about the Ninja Parenting Community, if you're at your wit's end with your child, and need some help making the impossible become possible!

Oct 10, 2017

Today's guest knows that we live in a time where everything around us – the challenges, the technology, changing culture – can seem both terrifying and awesome.

Former psychotherapist and current creativity coach Mark McGuinness teaches how to embrace the awesome, and mitigate the terrifying with his podcast, 21st Century Creative, and today he brings wonderful ideas for you to enjoy more of your parenting in this turbulent time.

Mark also brings something new to We Turned Out Okay: a guest-challenge!
An expert at helping people find time to accomplish their goals, Mark drops the gauntlet, setting YOU a challenge in this episode.
Completing Mark's challenge not only can help you find time in your life for the things you love, but might just when you a copy of his book, Productivity for Creative People… Three copies of which Mark has graciously offered three lucky WTOO listeners.

Listen to find out what the challenge is, and how to enter the giveaway – which ends Tuesday, October 17, 2017!

To take up the challenge: sometime on or before October 17, 2017, go to weturnedoutokay.com/contact and tell me how you did with Mark's challenge…

More key links in the show notes at weturnedoutokay.com/188!

Oct 3, 2017

In which I identify 5 different ways you might feel about your child and schooling, on a continuum from 1) you knew going into school that your child had issues that impact education, and would need to be addressed to 5) you have no worries about potential issues, and the school reports no problems.
It doesn't matter which of these five spots on the continuum you occupy – the way to work with your child's teachers is the same, 3 steps to keep in mind that make every interaction with your child's caregivers easier.

To read about these three steps and for key links, go to weturnedoutokay.com/187.
And if you're having trouble thinking past mindset and into concrete steps to help you worry less and enjoy more, click here to find out about the Ninja Parenting Community. It's the place where I help parents solve their toughest challenges every day, so I know it'll be helpful for you too!

Sep 28, 2017

In which we talk about how, when we are so worried, we can also feel simultaneously frozen and stuck – and, when we feel that way, the effect on our kids is devastating.

Sign up for round 2 of the Streamline Your Mornings Free 5-Day Challenge (which you know you want to if weekday mornings are, well, challenging : ) and for key links to today's episode by going to weturnedoutokay.com/186.

Click here to find out more about the Ninja Parenting Community, the place where I help parents solve their toughest challenges every day.

Sep 26, 2017

When he was just five years old and a child in preschool, Nicole Olson's son was suffering. Lots of changes were going on in his world, and in the midst of dealing with them he "lost his personality."
Nicole had thought that, if only she checked all the right boxes and pushed him into all the right activities, academic and otherwise, that he'd be fine.
When she discovered that was not the case, she felt about the biggest load of parental guilt that one could feel…
That sad, depressed 5-year-old is now 14 and thriving. Today's episode shares their story, and will feel so relevant for you if you worry at all about how your child will learn to get along in this world.
We share about a million links, so click weturnedoutokay.com/185 to grab them, and to sign up for the Streamline Your Mornings 5-Day Free Challenge, which starts in less than a week!

Click here to find out more about the Ninja Parenting Community, the place where I help parents solve their toughest challenges every day.

Sep 21, 2017

Here at the beginning of the school year, teachers are doing their initial assessments, figuring out who of their students is how far along the literacy timeline.

It can be a worrisome time for us parents – what if our kids don't read when they're supposed to?
What if they tell you "reading is boring"?
What if they hate reading?

We all know that reading is THE key to our children's future success… but how do you get them to want to read?

Today's bonus episode digs into the two most important factors in getting children to be happy readers.

Click here to listen, and to sign up for the upcoming Streamline Your Mornings 5-Day Challenge, which starts Monday, October 2!

Sep 19, 2017

If you're struggling with back-to-school time, or starting-school time – I'm creating shows this month and next to help you feel better.

Today's is all about homework.

Over the years I've had parents share the most horrible stories about homework and their little kids, like the mom whose six-year-old received an afterschool detention for missing four homework assignments in a row.
That one still makes me choke a little.

Or the one about a child forced to miss recess because of a parent's failure to log in and do the required "family homework."

When medical ethicist Dr. Arthur Caplan comes on this show and says "recess is a right," as he did in this episode last spring, I smile at his words.

But my blood pressure goes up.
Way up, at the thought of you and your young son or daughter coping with outrageous, damaging policies like these.

So today I'm taking everything my own training and experience tells me, and everything the wonderful teachers and doctors and folks who really understand young children (and who've spoken up on my show) – and I'm boiling it down into three steps to help you handle crazy homework demands.

Go to weturnedoutokay.com/184 for key links, and to read an outline of the three steps.
Also – Click here to sign up to join the Streamline Your Mornings Free 5-Day Challenge, which I'm offering again in early October!

Sep 14, 2017

With fall youth sports in full swing, I wanted to share something ugly that I witnessed last spring: a dad berating his young son, after the boy and his fellow teammates took a real drubbing, losing a soccer game big-time.

In this empathy-lacking, divisive grown-up-up world, what kids learn on the soccer field seems more important and relevant than ever before; listen to today's show to find out how a parent's attitude makes or breaks a child.

Click here to sign up for the upcoming Streamline Your Mornings Free 5-Day Challenge, which I'm bringing back for a second round because the first one was so effective and helpful for parents…

And go to weturnedoutokay.com/183 for key links to this episode!

1 2 3 4 Next »